Thursday, November 23, 2006

What St. Louis pro athletes are thankful for...

Stlsports, in celebration of Thanksgiving, took a little impromptu survey of pro athletes from the St. Louis area over the past few weeks in preparation for this story. So, in the first installment of what will likely be an annual event [unless legal challenges force this site to close prematurely], here is the "First Annual Stlsports What I'm Thankful For".

Leonard Little: "High-priced lawyers, and the salaries to pay them."

Jason Marquis: "Crazy high run support, and thus an inflated win total, right before free agency."

John Davidson: "Irrevocable season tickets."

Tony LaRussa: "Whoever was the fielding coach for the Tigers pitchers this past year."

Rick Ankiel: "Foolish loyalty."

Keith Tkachuk: "My No-Trade Clause."

Joe Buck: "The fact that my last name is Buck. Otherwise, I would probably be driving a bus for a living."

Juan Encarnacion: "Guaranteed contracts. Whew!"

Orlando Pace: "The fact that I don't have to be a part of that mess again until next fall."

Dave Checketts: "The part of the tax code that allows writing off business losses."

Scott Linehan: "The Arizona Cardinals."

Jeff Suppan: "Oh a little something called NLCS MVP in my walk year. Cha-ching!"

Mo Williams: "Companies that offer discreet packaging for shipping."

Jim Edmonds: "The thin market for outfield free agents this offseason."

Bill DeWitt: "Tax dollars as assistance for my impoverished team and starving players."

Doug Weight: "Bill Laurie's salary dump, particularly of me to Carolina."

Chris Duncan: "Chew."

[This story is a satire of public figures.]

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